There’s a whole lotta’ new going around.
COVID shook things up didn’t it?
Expats have been kicked out or displaced or put on hold. Brick and mortars are morphing into websites and zoom calls. Careers have shifted. Businesses have been reimagined. Paradigms have been demolished. Creative thinking has been forced.
For some, it has been a devastating scramble to stay afloat. For others, it has been the kick in the pants that they needed to finally do the thing they’ve been dreaming about for years. For a few, it has been a goldmine of new opportunities but not without moments of panic.
Regardless of the storyline, for so many, the old way of doing things just hit a wall and new is the new now.
If that’s you, keep reading.
If it’s not you and you just barreled through this whole global train wreck without skipping a beat . . . you can stop reading here.
And nobody likes you.
If you’re processing what comes next and you KNOW that it involves some flavor of NEW, then there are four people you should know. Technically more than four, but don’t get nit-picky. That’s so 2019.
Here they are.
THE FOUR RELATIONSHIPS YOU NEED IF YOU’RE DOING SOMETHING NEW
ONE: The Cheerleader
If you are branching out, launching, starting over, or some other form of doing something new … YOU NEED SOMEONE who is unconditionally, unequivocally, always, and no matter what, cheering for you.
Find an enthusiast, a gifted encourager, or an affirming friend who will watch from the sidelines and scream stuff like “you got this champ!” and “that’s alright, you’ll get ’em next time.”
Why?
Because doing new things is discouraging. Every time. There is ALWAYS a dip. There are ALWAYS challenges. You will ABSOLUTELY get knocked down.
And encouragement is a POWERFUL thing. The distant, screaming, supportive voice of people who are emotionally invested in your success doesn’t ensure that you will make it to the finish line but it will add fuel to your tank and you’ll never make it without that.
Asking for encouragement is a vulnerable proposition. Put yourself on the line. Tell the people who are already invested in you exactly what you’re doing, exactly how you feel about it, and exactly what you need from them.
Sidenote: This is different than an Instagram post. This is a direct, one to one, personal ask … of an individual (or several).
TWO: The Coach
Cheerleaders are great but not enough. You were probably already there in your head, weren’t you?
“I need MORE than just people telling me I’m great. What am I a Millennial?! Everybody gets a trophy?!!”
(sorry Millennials … I’m actually a big fan of your generation)
You’re absolutely right. You need more than accolades to make this work. That’s where a coach comes in.
A coach goes deeper. They see the hard stuff. They ask the hard questions. They push when you need pushed. They tell you to get up and try again when you fall down.
They see your potential before you do and they do everything they can to pull it out of you. They don’t just cheer you on, they work hard. They invest a lot more than emotions and when you crush it, the good ones feel it in their soul.
A coach’s role is to help you identify the barriers (external AND internal) between you and the place you want to be, then help you find your way there.
They’re not a consultant (they don’t tell you how).
They’re not a counselor (that’s a different thing).
They’re not a construction crew (they don’t clear the path for you).
They are a coach. They dig into the best qualities that you have to offer. They ask questions until you see them too. They help you chart the course. Then they walk with you until you’re there.
sidenote and shameless plug: I AM A COACH (what are the odds right?). If you’d like to explore what working with me would look like click here.
THREE: The Group
This one is powerful.
There is a MASSIVE difference between doing something on your own and doing something alone.
Finding the right group of people who share both your affinities and your struggles is a gamechanger in practically every way.
For starters, you need to get out of your head. Wrestling with everything from the golden ideas to the paralyzing fear of failure is transformed inside of a group. Your best ideas are tested and made better when you lay them out in front of the right people. Exposing your fears opens them to get crushed under the weight of discernment instead of fueling the fire of “what might go wrong.”
Groups shed light. They offer accountability. They dispense wisdom. They share resources. They provide checks and balances. They introduce new concepts. They break old paradigms. They pick you up when you get knocked down and they celebrate when you crush it.
Even the most fiercely independent solopreneurs benefit richly from surrounding themselves with like-minded people.
another sidenote and shameless plug: I (just happen to) run masterminds (weekly groups of like-minded people who do all of that stuff). Click here for more about that.
FOUR: The Superhero
News flash . . . you are not the first person to do something new. Many have tried and failed BUT some have figured it out.
They have traveled the road that you are about to take. They remember all the feels that you are feeling right now. They hit the barriers and navigated their way around them . . . or over them . . . or through them.
They’ve got powerful stories of pain and fortitude . . . tragedy and triumph . . . passion and resolve.
Those people are your superheroes.
Superheroes are inspiring because we can see something in them that we can imagine in ourselves. They are a goldmine when you’re on the edge of a fresh start.
So don’t just admire them . . . deconstruct them.
Pick them apart.
Glean their wisdom.
Learn from their success.
And their failures.
You have SO MUCH to learn from the people who have already learned SO MUCH.
Important point: Superheroes can be people you have access to OR NOT. If your heroes are friends or relatives or even people who will respond to your emails, then dig in. Pick their brains. Sit at their feet and soak it up.
If your heroes are big names with celebrity personalities who will never even know you exist, then become a student of their story. Absorb everything you can
final sidenote and shameless plug: I AM A SUPERHERO. Just kidding. I’m not but I did wear Spiderman underoos when I was a kid. So . . .
Here’s the kicker
Any one of these relationships is a good thing.
The life-giving encouragement of a cheerleader.
The visionary accountability of a coach.
The collective muscle of a group.
The catalyzing inspiration of a superhero.
They all stand alone . . . but together . . . wow.
If you want to GREATLY increase the chances that this new thing will become the thing that you dream about, then do the work to get ALL FOUR of these relationships in place.
